Almost every moment of our lives the tongue is used either consciously or unconsciously. For whatever and whenever the tongue is used, do you have control over it? James 3:8 makes us to understand the power that lies therein in the tongue.
“But the tongue can no man tame; it is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison.” “The power of life and death lies in the tongue. ”Proverbs 18:21.
Do you understand these passages? Be sincere to yourself, do you profess life as commanded in Matthew 28:19 by being His witness with the tongue he has given to you or do you engage in idle (death) talk with same tongue? James 3:10 says, “out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, it ought not to be so.”It is really amazing how this can be. Imagine a church service leader on Sunday evening at home quarrelling with his neighbors and saying “God punish you”. Just imagine it.
Some Christians not knowing the power in the tongue are so fond of saying negative things. ‘Nigeria will never change.’ ‘He will never make it in life,’ ‘she will never get a husband,’ etc. You may be one of those in this category. Let me tell you, unless you stop being apessimist and change your attitude and start saying positive things knowingfully well that there is a Lord that cares, that problem you have may press you to your grave. When I say positive confessions, I mean those that are in line with God’s word. For example, the Bible says that we should say we are strong even in our weaknesses and that we are rich even in our poverty, but not a lazy person that has refused to work claiming that God will provide his or her every financial need. That is completely way off the mark because the word of God clearly spells out that the lazy should not eat.
At home how is your tongue used? As a husband, wife and child how do you use your tongue? As one who professes Christ, how can you handle a crisis in your home? Simply try to prevent it from escalating. How do you achieve this? By guarding the tongue! When used to make sarcastic and insulting remarks, this small member can be very dangerous. Remember James 3:8? More so, Proverbs 15:1 say “a soft answer turneth away wrath” but grievous word stir up anger.”
In your marriage or relationship how do you use your tongue? Are you always criticizing you partner and hardly ever appreciative? From the marriage seminars and messages I have attended and heard respectively, appreciation is always spelt out as one of the key ingredients of a sweet marriage or relationship.Appreciate your partners’ shortcomings, making the necessary correction with your tongue but at the appropriate time (never in public). You should also celebrate your partner’s strength with the same tongue. Marriage and relationships have crumbled just because one of the partners refused to say the most important three words in restoring a union. A simple “I am sorry” with the tongue God has given to you has become too difficult for the single reason of pride inherent in the person. I can’t understand why this is so because even when you are right and say it, the tongue does not stop its function neither does it hurt.
What is your conduct like in your place of work? Some Christians, especially in the north are not known to be Christians at their places of work because unfortunately they never talk about Christ. A friend of mine told me that one day he was discussing with colleague and mentioned that he went to church. The colleague being a Muslim asked him if he went to check on somebody and was shocked to discover that after more than a year in the same office, he was a Christian. I was even more shocked because I know the tongue is given for “profitable discussion” and to profess Christ.
In church settings, people still dishonor God with their tongue. Somebody has offended you in the church and instead of calling the persons attention in love, you decide to go and give the person a ‘piece of your mind’ thereby misusing the tongue… “Correct in love” Ephesians 4:2, so that peace may reign. People under the guise that ‘me I dey speak my mind one time.’ misuse this beautiful instrument that God has given to us.
Some of us would have been better off practicing law considering the manner and frequency with which we judge and condemn others with reckless abandon. We condemn people who sin as if the Bible does not state that there is none righteous and also as if we are better off and above temptation to sin. Checkout the story of the woman caught in adultery (John 8:1-11) after everyone with sin had left, Christ asked her “who condemeth you?” there was no one of course.This is a good lesson from Christ to you. “Condemn not, ye shall not be condemned...” Luke 6:37.
Some condemn other people’s tribes and cultures as if there is none without its faults. God created tribes and cultures in Genesis 11:6 to stop the people then from dishonoring Him. The same God brought back a unifying and perfect language which is Jesus Christ. (Colossians 3:11). Verse 10 of the passage says after putting on a new self (i.e. after receiving Jesus) what we should know, do and become, is in verse 11. The message is very clear; there should not be any distinction amongst tribes and people. Why then do we judge and condemn? It is simple! The mind of Christ is not in us as Philippians 2:5 demands. In that your situation or encounter with people would Christ have judged the way you did? More often than not we select the areas of our lives that are good and try to use them as a yardstick for judging others forgetting our own shortcomings.
Why do we exhibit positive and negative characteristics with our tongues? “Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh” (Matthew 12:34). It is only what you have inside that will eventually show up on the outside. If you are fond of unwholesome talk, gossiping and backbiting, know it today that it is exactly the stuff you are made up of. For you to be able to come out withe difying, encouraging and comforting words, your inside (heart) must be decked up with godly things. (Psalms 119: 9, 11). If your inside is corrupt but always when in the presence of brethren your words are edifying, you are a first grade hypocrite. It is only a matter of time before the true you show up.
A brother was giving a testimony in one church service one day. In the course of the testimony he said “walahi” (in Hausa interpreted as ‘I swear to God’). The entire congregation started laughing and the brother not realizing his folly (because he is fond of using God’s name in vain) was also seriously laughing as he continued with his testimony. For many of us, our inside is so full of rubbish that we find it difficult to control our tongue even inside the church; where many pretend without much ado.
When you approach a lady to ask her out or as a lady you are in a relationship, how does your tongue come into play? Do you speak so fluently and eloquently coating your lies (we don’t call it lies these days- it is called yarns) with icing sugar? You say all sorts of things to boost your status while in the beginning you had said God spoke to you concerning the sister. How dare you associate God with your lies? You are of the devil because he is the father of lies. (John 8:44)
Asa sister, you tell lies to make your upbringing or family background look like it is made in heaven. You go to the extent of making yourself so artificial with your lies. This is why many relationships suffer. They are built on so much artificiality and lies spoken with the tongue that is supposed to glorify God at all times. Have you ever been found encouraging someone in need or the opposite is always the case? Some people go to visit a family that has been bereaved and instead of the encouragement they are supposed to receive, the visit worsens the situation and leaves the family in more pain.
Proverbs 15:2 says, “the tongue of the wise useth knowledge aright: but the mouth of fools poureth out foolishness.” Are you a wise person that handles matters wisely like King Solomon in 1 Kings 3:16-28 or do you take side’s unnecessarily leaving people unsatisfied and unhappy and the situation unpleasant? When you use your tongue how do people react?
The earlier we begin to have control over our tongue and tame it, the better for us. We should begin to understand that every word we speak should show Christ because that is exactly what it was given for and not for all others mentioned. The use of the tongue can be summoned up thus: It should be used for singing praises and not for reigning curses; it should be used for professing Christ and not for disgracing Him; it should be used for making peace and not for declaring war. Above all as Christians, it should be used for building up rather than tearing down.
How do you use your tongue? Going through all these, is there an aspect in which you have failed the Lord? Our God is a God of a second chance.
You can still ask for forgiveness and end it up with this prayer;
“Set a watch, O Lord on my mouth; keep the door of my lips,” Psalms 141:3...And the Lord will do it in Jesus name. Amen.
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